What The Bachelor Has Taught Us

08 February 2016

The Bachelor

For 30 marvelous, juicy, cringe-worthy, swoon-worthy seasons, ABC’s The Bachelor and The Bachelorette has entertained us. This entertainment (both good and bad) hasn’t wilted like the long-lost relationships of the reality TV show’s past, but it has grown stronger and more popular with each season. The Bachelor Season 20 gives bachelor Ben Higgins’ a turn to find love, dish out roses, and pick his dream woman. We all hope! Out of the two series combined six couples are either still dating or are married. Not too bad, but those stats aren’t good enough to make us all believers that the show’s formula for love actually works.

The Bachelor and Bachelorette can be a viewer learning tool of sorts. We here at All For Color have learned a thing or two by watching season after season of this love finding game. Most of what we discovered applies to future contestants of the hit dating show. Other takeaways we now know can be used in our everyday dating adventures. Do you want us to share our Bachelor/Bachelorette knowledge with you? We know you do!

  • Tissues. Those who are avid Bachelor season watchers know tissues are an underrated accessory on the show. One guy, 15 women, and unlimited bottles of wine creates the perfect storm of tears. You’d think Kleenex would be a sponsored advertiser, but the reality is most of the women end up using their tanned, manicured hands to wipe away the tears and snot time and time again. Ladies, remember the tissues please!
  • Helicopters. This goes for both The Bachelor and The Bachelorette--remember, he/she really doesn’t own that chopper. No, it’s more like a beat up Chevy back home. Keeping this in mind, will help soften the blow when the reality cameras stop rolling.
  • The Crazy Girl. There is bound to be one. Yep, the wine sipping, spastic, oddball girl in the house. How else do the ratings get to be 11 million? Note to self, when in public and you witness a slightly tipsy blonde chatting to the coconut tree out back–hand her a cup of caffeine and a tissue for her soggy mascara. She’ll probably smile and thank you–just tell her it’s something you learned during your time at the bachelor mansion.
  • Roses. When a man (or lady) asks you, “will you accept this rose?” Really think about it. If you’re only accepting the rose based on the person’s limo, helicopter, white veneer smile, frequent flyer miles, and flashy wardrobe there is a chance it is all a mirage.
  • Hot Tubs. Just don’t do it! First the germs and second, it’s just too corny. Stay out of the hot tub!
  • Multiple Individuals With The Same First Name. It never fails, there are always multiple ‘Laurens’ or double ‘Bens’ each season of the show. If you’re in a school or work atmosphere with this situation going on simply adding the first letter of their last name after their first name will make remembering who is who easier. For example, Lauren A., Lauren H., Lauren J., and so on.
  • Love. Pick your words wisely. You’ve just met the guy six weeks ago. Do you really love him or is it the wine and dine talking?
  • Sky Diving. If you find yourself on a first date that has a major adrenaline rush like skydiving off the Golden Gate Bridge or propelling down a sky scraper it doesn’t necessarily imply that you’re meant to be together forever. It could signify that you’re both nuts and have a secret death wish.
  • The Ring. Don’t be tempted by the size and sparkle of the 12 karat Neil Lane diamond ring. If you don’t love the guy–just say no. It will make your appearance on  After the Final Rose Show less embarrassing.
  • The Ugly Crier. This goes in hand with our first lesson (the tissues), but no one feels sorry for an ugly crier! Sobbing with eyes shut, mouth gaped wide open, and cheeks flushed isn’t sexy. Politely excuse yourself to go off camera and have a good quiet cry in the bathroom.

We bet you didn’t know that you could learn so much from a show that has a rich history of hot tubs, romance, rendezvous, lies, love, and roses did you? Tune in to ‘learn’ some more as The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8pm on ABC.

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